I’ve grown in several areas over these past six and a half years: 1.) Physically: I’ve gained and lost a total of 140lbs. Thirty-five-ish per pregnancy, give or take, as some pregnancies required more chocolate/nachos than others. 2.) Vanity: I ditched any remaining shred of coolness when we bought a minivan, which I had vowed to never do because only nerds drive minivans. 3. Control: I largely stopped dressing my children in coordinated outfits. Ain’t nobody got time for that. 4.) McGuyver-ability quotient: I have grown entirely more adaptable in situations previously deemed too hard or totally despair-worthy, ie: broken legs (we’ve had three so far), newborn baby colds (stopped counting at a dozen), forgetting to bring a pack n play on an overnight trip. NBD, man. Life will go on.
Here is what to expect when you have FOUR KIDS, if you are considering doing such a thing. You crazy lunatic, you.
- When you take your whole tribe around town, people act kind of weird, like you have seven heads. I took the kids to the doctor’s for a checkup the other day, and within an hour, FOUR different people stopped me to ask if all four kids belonged to me. One lady even stopped her car and rolled down her window to ask. Yes, you sweet bystander. This freakshow is all mine. Here is a sampling of unsolicited comments I regularly hear (like multiple times a day) while running errands: “Whoa, that’s a lot of kids!””Are they all yours?” “You have your hands full!” “Did you plan this?” “Better you than me!”
- Your day-to-day becomes a real life version of the movie Memento. Do you remember that movie? It’s about a guy who can only remember fifteen minute increments before he forgets everything that happened leading up to it. Super suspenseful and stressful, but I don’t really remember much else about it because, like I said, wait – what was I just saying? No, but seriously. I’m the Steph Curry of forgetfulness. The reason is basically that your brain is like an internet browser (this is a real science fact that I pulled from my vast knowledge of sciencey things). Moms of four children have approximately 462 browser tabs open at any given time. Did I pay the phone bill? Is today Wednesday? Wednesday is early pickup. When did the baby nurse last? On which side? We need solar panels. Why does child #2 have his outfit on entirely backwards? Why do I not care? Has child #3 consumed any vegetables today…yesterday…the last three days? Meanwhile, four of the tabs (the children) are talking to you like those video pop up ads that come out of NOWHERE, yelling about who the heck knows what. So, for reasons you can imagine, some things are just forgotten: jackets, backpacks, sending your mom the Mothers Day card that has been sitting on your desk for a MONTH, texting people back, dropping off the dry cleaning, ordering Nespresso pod refills.
- Getting out of the house every morning is basically like living in the movie Jumanji. I’ve been doing this four kids thang every day for the last nine months, so the chaos has become my “normal.” A few weeks ago I had a doctor’s appointment in the morning, so David had to get all of the kids ready, fed and out the door by 8:30. David is very hands-on when it comes to the dad-stuff. Diapers, feeding, dressing, you name it, he seriously does it all. But until this day, he hadn’t done a full morning with all four kids on his own. He met up with me to switch cars at 8:45. All the children were fed, dressed and even had shoes on. When I asked him how it went, he calmly responded, “Yeah, that was insane.” I guess it is. It’s the baby crying because the three year old is sitting on her while you try to brush the eldest’s tangled hair into a ponytail; it’s the five year old, unable to decipher the English words you are speaking when you tell him for the eleventieth time to PUT ON THE SHOES, ONTO THE FEET THAT ARE YOURS, THAT BELONG TO YOUR LEGS, AT THE BOTTOM OF THE LEGS, JUST BEYOND THE ANKLES, EACH FOOT GETS ONE SHOE AND PLEASE PUT THEM ON NOW BEFORE MY HEAD EXPLODES. NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW. And then you get a miffed response, “OK!” Like, “Sheesh!” Like, “Omigosh, mom you need to calm down.” Yes, because clearly I am the unreasonable one.
- After you take a shower and clip your nails, and then clip your kids’ nails, by the time you are done, you have just clipped one hundred nails. ONE HUNDRED NAILS. (Also I just realized that could be a great name for the band I will start with my children. We will figure out how to play instruments at some point after we have mastered the putting on of the shoes. First things first.)
- Speaking of showers, any tiny moment of privacy is now long gone. I took literally 3 minutes to shower off the stickiness from making breakfast the other morning. All the while, one little darling stood outside asking if I was done yet because they needed to show me a trick. “How about now? Are you done now?” “I will be done in two minutes, you precious angel from my womb!” (I said either that or something like that…-ish) “Ok…” (seven seconds later:) “How about now? Has it been two minutes?” So I just canceled the tiny remaining shower I thought I was entitled to. I was rushed through my drying-off process and over to the “trick,” which turned out to be a child who had spread a small blanket on the floor…and then jumped over it.
- One fun thing about having four kids is the opportunity to cook for multiple picky eaters at once. When cooking for four tiny food critics, you are pretty much guaranteed to never make a meal that every person will enjoy or even say positive things about. This is why I am working on training up my children in the way they should go. And here that means don’t critique mom’s meal choice and hard work, lest you skip dinner and have to wait for breakfast. I’m trying to implement a rule that when they ask what’s for dinner and I describe a lovely, nutritious meal, they may respond in one of two ways: a.) “Yay! Thanks, mom!” OR b.) “Ok!” If I did not ask for your opinion on the meal, then you can just keep those words in your head, mmkay?
- You will probably bathe your four children less often than you bathed your kids when you had one or two. Not necessarily saying that I do this, but I’ve heard some totally reasonable moms of four kids say that they will go multiple days between kid baths. If I did know a mom who said that, I’d be like, “Hey, you seem like a pretty cool lady with great taste in music and Netflix shows. I trust your discretion when it comes to your kids’ bath frequency.” A hypothetical mom might space baths a few days apart when it’s necessary for her sanity; like when she needs bedtime to happen NOW, and not like in 45 minutes after lathering, rinsing and repeating on FOUR separate bodies. But that’s just what I’ve heard. For some people. Sometimes. Or maybe a lot of times. (You don’t know my life.)
- Even though strangers regularly comment on your reproductive schedule and gawk at you like you’re straight-up cray; and even though the day is bursting at the seams with chaos and unreasonable behavior and dishes and crumbs and dirty cars; and even though walking through a buffet line with a nine month old in an Ergo is like wearing an octopus; and even though the laundry situation is so dire that you have considered starting a nudist colony; and even though, wait…what was I saying? Oh, yeah. Ok, even though all of these things make life hard and complicated and sometimes your head almost explodes, each time you bring home yet another baby, you are blown away that you can love something as individually and tenderly as all the other babies, who you thought took up every last morsel of your love capacity. And at the end of the day, when all the precious angels are asleep, and you are enjoying a glass of Sauv Blanc and a bag of Orville Redenbacher, Netflix binging alongside your husband, you marvel at your lives together and the babies entrusted to you. You wouldn’t have planned it any other way. (Except maybe if the other way meant you could have a free maid and chef, then yes, definitely I would have planned it that way.)
This is amazing!! I felt like I was reading about myself! I have 6 1/2, 4, 2 and 4 months! Lol thank you for shining a light on our beautiful chaos!
Ahoy, girl, we are in the same boat! 😉 Glad you enjoyed.
This was so cute!!! My 1st is on his own (24), well, sort of, and we homeschool the remaining four: 17, 16, 14, 12… So it’s 4 in the house and it’s just as cray as you say above! What a fun writer you are! And I’m so happy that, out of the 6 of us, 2 are full blown vegetarians. It makes every meal a more interesting challenge :)))))
I thought I wanted four, until I had my third! So funny and I think the bath frequency of this lady is on point ?
I somehow had this thought of, “I could do that!” till I got to the clipping of 100 nails. Beautifully written, wonderful in all ways.
Aw, thanks Allison!
Do it anyway. You don’t actually have to clip their nails. They bite them off quite neatly.
And yet it all goes by so fast! Ours now 24, 22, 19 and 17. Those really were sweet, hard, funny, exasperating, marvelous years! <3
I love this so much!!! It made me feel normal and GOOD about us!
Oh my goodness, the best thing I’ve read yet on having 4 kids (or more). I’m the eldest of 9 kids and have 4 of my own now. My youngest is just two weeks old, so I have yet to truly experience all this with 4 kids….but I laughed so hard tears were rolling down my face. So true! But wouldn’t trade one bit of it…
Eldest of NINE?! Props to your mama! And congrats on your newest addition!
This. Is. Awesome. My life totally. Except I also get asked sometimes if I run a daycare. 🙂 Thanks for making me feel gotten.
Haven’t gotten the daycare one yet. That is hilarious. Solidarity, sister!
Four here, also, and you totally hit the nail on the head. Mine are 8, 6, 3, and 16 mo. I just lectured them the other day on how we (they) need to bathe more often now that it’s summer, aaaand I’m pretty sure no one has had a bath since that happened, lol.
Summer’s the best because hoses and pools basically count as a shower. 😉
Boy, Howdy! True truth here. I have 9 children 40-16 years of age. Fought the state 1982-1996 for the right to homeschool them all for as long as God lead us to do. I feel your pain. We left one church because of the awful way the women judged me. But I am so thankful for each and every one of them. Just 2 teenagers left at home. Still challenging. Esp since I am nearly 60. Did you know that 2 teenage mouths can be more taxing to the mother soul than 6 or so little ones? I am praying for you magnificent mommies! — Wait, what was I saying? — Oh, yeah — go get ’em, your wonderful tigresses!
Nine! And homeschool! Amazing mama. And I hear about the mythical teenager creature…Lord, be near!
This is amazing and SO our lives. Mine are 5, 2, and 14 month old twins. My other favorite comments: “I don’t know how you do it!” And two people have actually told my husband in some form or fashion that they would kill themselves if they were us. So that’s always nice.
5, 2 and 14 month old twins!!! You rock, mama! I’ve never gotten that comment but oh my word. People are something else!
I’ve had the “I don’t know how you do it” comment and I reply with a version of “I don’t!”. 🙂
Love this! We’ve finally made it to the point where they can shower themselves. (12,11,9,7) Even then, there are hypothetical days that they might go more than a day or two between showers. 😉 Still get the comments from strangers and there are still crazy insane days, but the friendships that are starting to show up between my kids and the days that aren’t completely insane make it worth all the craziness that led to this point.
Thank you for leaving this sweet little glimmer of hope to us mamas of tiny crazies! 😉
We had twice a week baths, much to my mother-in-law’s dismay. Sometime between 4 and the highschool prom they became independent clean freaks, so it all works out.
This was wonderful and soooo me a few years ago. Now those munchkins are 16, 18, 20, & 22. I would not have traded my life for anything – most of the time. Hang in there , young mommies, the teen years are just as crazy and just as wonderful! And the adult children add blessings upon blessings! (I even miss SOME of this stage!) Thanks for the post!
Yup. I’ve got 6. All of this is so true! Especially the part where we go anywhere and the crew follow me in a single file line like ducklings. The stares. The, “They all came from YOUR body?! Wait, you must be Mormon. Or at least Catholic, right? But do you know how you get that many kids?” Yup. I was there for all of it. Keep mommin’ on, lady friend. You’re rockin’ the multitudes!
Mine are 6.5, 4.5, almost 3, and 7 months. The oldest just had surgery on his arm that’s broken four times in the past two years. The folks at the orthopedist’s office loved gawking at a baby-wearing, double-stroller-pushing mama. Why yes, this is my circus and these are my monkeys! haha
“This is my circus and these are my monkeys!” Love this so much I might have to use it. We have had a couple of leg breaks ourselves but I cannot imagine four in two years. Hoping for no more breaks and a quick recovery from surgery for your kiddo!
My mom just sent me this article…..
I laughed & cried …reading this takes me back- yes! To 4 picky eaters, filling out back to school packets every year?, people asked did you plan 4 kids, are they ALL yours & are you having more?
what’s funny is after the birth of my 3rd son, i thought i’m done- this is too hard!!! God had other plans & our baby girl was born!! Time fly by…Today they are 23, 20, 17 & about to 13…the crazy chaos was worth it! They are amazing big kids …i have a wonderful partner/husband who has been right beside me!!! I am SO blessed!!❤
I feel I could have wrote this! I am a momma to five kiddos, 10,8,3,18 months, and 3 weeks! It is crazy to say the least. I am the butt of every brady bunch joke, and I frequently get asked by complete strangers if I “know what causes that” or “‘are they all yours”. Did I mention they are all boys except the 8 year old! So, ya I basically need a house composed of mattresses and bubble wrap. But, seriously I love having a big family. I would have more, but my body doesn’t agree. Just know you all are doing your best, and keep up the good work.
P.S. No one(including myself) gets to take a shower every single day at this point hahaha
We had 7! Thoroughly enjoyed reading this. It brings back memories.I wouldn’t change a thing. My children are now ages 31 down to 17.
My sister, a mother of 4 just a shared this to me, a mother of 4. All I can say is we could be friends you and I. Real easy. That. Was. Awesome. For reals mama, all of it! Fist bump, solidarity girl. I have 8 hands full of mud shoving rocks that are “SOO cool!” In my face AS I TYPE to show me and I am “oh WOWing ” on key with an intrigued smile. Thank you for candid. For real human words for those of us in it. I adore my 4 hellacious darlings- I just some days need a mute button and a crate of dark beer.
I love this….I am a mom of 6 and everything you said is exactly how I feel on a daily basis. I would love to just change all your 4’s to 6’s and post….people this is my life…..for real!!! So if I don’t answer you right away, call you back, remember it’s your birthday, have all of my kids with their shoes And socks on……it’s OK….we have a life and we are loving every minute of it….well maybe not every minute of it but most of it!!!! 🙂
Mother of 8 here and loved every moment! Thanks for putting into words our life to help my friends understand our reality. Only have four left at home and life has changed. Two teens and two adult kids. Enjoy every crazy moment as it passes too fast.
This… Just yes! I only (ha- only) have 3 kids, but our households still sound alike. ? Great article. Hang in there! I’m sure it gets easier….. Right???
Shelly
http://www.theperfectlyimperfectwoman.com
Word. To all of this. I felt like every single thing you said could have come out of my mouth. Mine are 8, 6, 4, and 20 months and it’s just chaos. It really is. Thanks for the great read. I think you’re my spirit animal wherever you are in this world.
God love each of you! I wanted 4, but 3 was all I got. My favorite question: if you had a boy and a girl, why have another?” Enjoyed almost every minute!!
My small people are 7, 4, 3, & 2. The last three are girls, so there is a decent amount of passion, passionate yelling, passionate tears, and what I like to refer to as “the puddle on the floor” moment.s in our house. You hit the nail on the head. Laughed so hard I cried. Thank goodness I already pee’d or I probably would have done that too.
This was so my life 10 years ago……my littles are now 16,14,12,10……feel so blessed we had 4!!! Our kids LOVE each other and I’m so glad we had them so close together…..even though at the time we had 4 in 6 years people thought we were INSANE!! 🙂 Treasure the younger years…..once they get in school, time seems to speed along even faster! I even got my Masters in Counseling when they all went back to school!!
Kids 8, 5, 4 and 10 months. Good article. Would say more but…
Mine are 9, 8, 7 and 5. I get asked all the time if they are all mine and people gasp when I say yes lol and I always get the handful question. I absolutely wouldn’t have it any other way, they are all best friends! Loved reading this, all I could do was shake my head…..yes, yes, yep, totally, uh huh
This was great! Possibly one of the best ‘moms of many’ posts I have ever read 🙂 We have 4 right now ages 9, 6, 4 & 2 with #5 on the way. Yes, people think we are insane LOL
LOVE this! I have four sons, 7,5,3,1 and am expecting #5 on Christmas!! I literally pictured something in my life happening under each section I read. My favorite was the “trick” oh yeah, and the morning shoes..EVERY SINGLE DAY, after about the thirteenth time to my 3 year old, who has lost his shoes from carrying them all over the house by this time.. “Go put your shoes on before mommy starts freaking out and screams at you” in reply I get a higher pitched “okaaaaayyyyyyyy mommyyyyyyyy” accompanied by a drop in his shoulders and a large exhale?. In case you ever consider putting a laundry drop in from your bathroom to the laundry room closet, DONT! Clothes never make it there, and it allows another unlockable entrance for you kids to use when they desperately need to talk to you about how his brother stuck his tongue out at him while they were eating the candy from the valentines cards you just spent you evening putting together because , you know, you have to do it for four kids! Again, love this article, glad I’m not crazy all by myself!!
4 kiddos here. Ages 12, 10, 2 and 7 months. Love this blog. Totally my family right now. Sometimes I wish for just three hours of silence. Or I wish the kids were grown, but then I look in their faces and realize how much I love their squishyness, hugs , chaos and play. I wouldn’t have it any other way.
I just had my 5th. Loved this post. Recently saw a quote that read, “if you think my hands are full, you should see my heart” wouldn’t trade these Littles for anything!
Mom of four boys here, between the ages of 1 and 10. This was so fun to read! I laughed out loud through the whole thing. Everything you said was oh so true! Great job!
Molly – this is great! I have nine kids myself (29 to 12) and can truly relate to all the points. I especially laughed when I read #6. There are very few meals that EVERYONE likes and that includes my husband. Pizza was one of them, that is, until we discovered that one of the kids is lactose intolerant. 🙁 We have a rule in the house – NO ONE is allowed to complain or whine about anything and that includes dinner. And the kids mainly did and do adhere to that rule. It is only coming out now from some of my adult children that there were some meals that they really didn’t like but they ate it without a complaint.
Enjoy this time of parenting. Take each moment as a precious gift from God. Soon enough your children will be grown and taking their own paths but this is the time for cuddly hugs, knock knock jokes, silly laughter, and loads of love.
~ Mar
It does get easier! Mine are 15, 14, 10 and 6. And all boys to boot. Not only can they bathe themselves and brush their own teeth, but thankfully they can cut their own food! I do not miss having to cut up 4 dinners before being able to enjoy my own. I still get the “are they all yours” question and “all boys? God bless you!”. Those comments never end! I would not give up any of it though. I still cry every time my older two play a concert in band or orchestra or anytime one of them wins an award, no matter how small. I am proud of every little accomplishment and my heart feels ready to burst every time I look at them and think, ” yeah, they are all mine”.
You’re an amazing mom. I loved reading this article. I have 7 children. 15, 9, 7, 7, 5, 2, 9mo. My life is pretty much the same as yours. I dare not do anything with my 9mo old in my arms. Dinner time is eat or starve. That goes over very lovely. Taking the kids to the store is a joke. When people stare, I stare back and smile. When they give dirty looks, I laugh. My children love me, I love them. They’re alive, and so am I. We are happy. My brain is slowly deteriorating, but we’re happy :).Oh, and bath time….yeah…we’re going with “building up the immune system”.
Say that’s great. We have a family like that, but one major difference. They live in her dad’s basement, neither has a full time job, so therefore they live off welfare. Oh and the first 2 were born before they got married. Putting the cart before the horse in many ways.
Laughed until I had tears! My life exactly? Thanks for this.
my children are now 33,30,28,25 (all boys),and 14 (girl), and I have to say…I miss those days! ENJOY
Mine are 39, 36, 33, and 31, and yes I miss those days. This was my life plus I worked a full time job during most of those years. I am amazed that I am sane as I sit.here reminiscing. When you begin to think you won’t survive it, remember this: grandchildren make it all worth it!!!
I have a 25,22,21 and 16 year old. Those days were fun, trying and nonstop. Wouldn’t trade the memories for anything. Sometimes wish we had recorded the insanity!
We have 4 and it has been crazy awesome. We actually had our 4th before our oldest was 4 so we had 4 under 4. No twins just 4 events we will say. I agree that people tend to have lots to say about that for sure.
I think my wife will way that one of her funniest moments was being at IRISH DANCE class and looking at a mom who looked amused and saying how hard 4 children are to raise at once. And the women looked at my wife smiled and said I know 4 was pretty hard but i at 11 and that is pretty hard also. LOL my wife said she never felt the need to complain much after that.
Thank you for writing about my life! 🙂 Mine are 6, 4, 2, and 9 months.
My husband and I both laughed so hard while reading this.
Hi from Georgia. My kids are 21, 19, 17, 12, 10 & 8. I remember the fascination (& sometimes judgement) when I was out & about with them all. I finally decided people think they’re hilarious when they say, “You’ve got you’re hands full.”
The part of your article the really hit home with me is having a kid or kids outside the bathroom trying to get you to hurry up. I still can’t handle that well! Love to All.
Tooooo funny!!
This is great! I have twelve kids and my days are hard and loooooong. Reading this reminded me that if we survive the day and make it to bedtime, it is enough! Mine are 24 (married and out of the house!), 16,15,14,12,11,9,6,5,3, and 1.5 year old twins 🙂
I have 4 as well! This cracked me up–it’s on point!! My kids are now 15, 12, 9 and 5. Some things are better, others continue to be just as crazy!!
This is just so funny… The laundry, the fights over nothing, the shoes, the picky eaters… OMG she totally gets it! Our four kids are 7, 5, 4, and . I have a friend who has 5 children and is raising her 2 nephews (so 7 total!) from 10 years down to 1… so that’s keeps my woes in check!
We have 5, who are mostly grown now. It’s equally accurate for more children. The only thing I would add is that my kids bathed more than many of their friends (or at least went in the tub) as that was my go-to if the wheels were falling off the bus. “How about a bath?” I would ask in exasperation. This would be followed by a cheer and 5 little bodies hurtling clothes as they stampeded into the bathroom. A dash of bubbles and everyone was best friends again!
I love this idea!
This is amazing. I have a 5.5yo, 4.5yo, 2.5yo and a 1yo! We live an exciting busy life for sure!!
My four are now 24, 23, 21, and 19 years old and all in college. Talk about insane! When I complain about four different rent payments, the crisis of maintaining car insurance and four automobiles, or the price of weddings these days (because yes, we have one of those coming in December), my oldest will say “well it’s cheaper than paying for rehab.” Yes…yes indeed. My husband and I are blessed with four awesome young adults who are respectful and yet enough ornery to make us laugh. Hang in there! Oh, and when I made finner, my kids were allowed to say “Yum!” or “I haven’t learned to like that yet.” ?
Ditto! And mine are now 31, 29, 27, and 26. Amazing people- I’d do it all over again.
5,4,2,6 months… I get it, nice to know I’m not the only one.
14,12,10,8. I call them the hooligans. ?
Our “FOUR” are 22, 24, 27 and 30….. each “stage” of life brought its own adventures/ expenses….. which included 4 college graduations & 3 weddings in recent years….. we have been blessed with some amazing adult children who all live within 20 miles of our farmhouse…. and yes, grandbabies are the reward ….. {#4 is one the way}.
Why do you pay their rent. I’m 20 and I pay my own rent.
Hilarious and true!! My four are now 29, 26, and 24 (twins).we all survived those so devil crazy years. Each is married and all live out of state. My life is more organized and my house is relatively clean now, but so quiet and lonely. I can’t wait to see them and their spouses, along with 4 grandkids, at a cabin in Californua in 11 more days!!,
Thanks for this. We have 6 kids so far so we are on the crazy train. Our new inside joke/answer to anything is: “having 6 kids is really hard,” because it is and we were saying it so often it became funny.
Who is she?
Thank you for the laugh today! Mine are 5, 4, 3, 2, and one brand new!
We have 10…..yes, it is often crazy…..but I wouldn’t change it for the world. Some minutes I would definitely like a do over…..but yeah, those go into the past just like all the rest. As for bathing…..Under 6 years you can get away with 2x a week if no one is looking…..and between 7 and say 11…..I suggest daily….and insist when they stink. Over 11……3x per day please and thank you…..do you need more deodorant??? Mine are 6 to 21……and 2 grands on the way…..funny to think that 4 gets you that much attention….but I think people just don’t know what to say!
From one mother of four to another – that was awesome! Thank you!
Oh my gosh, yes to all of this! Mine are 7, 5, 2 and 2 weeks… lol so far three seems just as crazy as 4 but #4 is not in, soccer or swimming or dance etc… lolololol To all you mama’s and papa’s out there, I salute you!!!
Let’s just face it-no one can imagine it! They just stand in awe and then make themselves feel better by making some-I just don’t know how you do it comment-it’s life!!!! Planet full of people-raise tolerant problem solvers one big family at a time—otherwise hush and lend a hand! I can put someone to work anytime any age—we stay busy!!!!
When mine were very young a stranger said to me in a store, “I’m glad they’re yours and not mine.” My response? “SO AM I!”
Wow….who knew that my life could be written so well in several paragraphs! Lol I have 4 kids as well. They are 12, 5, 3, and 2. Having the 3 youngest so close in age is quite possibly the craziest thing I’ve ever done but apparently was God’s plan for us. He has a good sense of humor I must say. They’re all the lights of my life but there are days I feel more like a bouncer than a parent. Thanks for this as it’s nice to see I’m not the only insane person around. ?
I really enjoyed this! It was entertaining and well written! We also have four; I think it was hardest going from two to three–because suddenly I didn’t have enough hands to hold all of theirs as we walked across busy Chicago streets. It’s fun to see who they are all turning out to be.
I love #2! I really thought I was getting early onset dementia:)
Thank you for this!! All of it!! I needed that laugh.
Sincerely, fellow mom of four…ummm…how old are my kids… oh yeah…8,5,2,1
“I trust your discretion when it comes to your kids’ bath frequency.” Best quote!
Thanks I loved every bit of this. I’m a father of four, but often have them just as much as my wife due to our work schedules. This was right on the money. I will have to share this with the wifeee.
SO relatable! Thank you so much for the laugh today.
Mine are now 16, 16, 20, and 21. They are all between 5′ 10″ and 6′ 5″. When we go places it’s like parting the Red Sea Everyone moves and gawks at the crazy Amazon family. Lol. But, as they age you have 4 to shovel snow, mow the lawn, and haul groceries into the house. When they all move out , I may then get a maid. ?
Highly amusing! I have 8, most grown up now. I remember that every time we had a new baby I would lock us out of the car one time while out with all the kids by myself and have to call a locksmith or AAA, due to disorientation described in this article.Very embarrassing. Also when we had a new child, I had difficulty remembering how many kids were with me, also partly due to not always having them all with me.
I had all five in NYC — baby in carrier, toddler in stroller, and three older — and had people stop me on the street. One woman grabbed my arm and said, “Bless you!”
This is on point and made me giggle after trying to get our tribe out in time for church this morning only to be stopped by a gaggle of Geese (yes geese) which made us late. Thank you for the smile after a long day!
Intwresting. There are days like that but not daily. I have 5 kids and had 4-6 other kids as I ran a home daycare. We had a sitter maybe once every 6 months and my husband traveled most weeks. Set a schedule and give the extra time for those crazy days that nobody is on time. My kids were never tardy to school nor forgotten to be picked up. Give grace for the awesome days and shoot for that schedule again. You have one sick, throw in the towel but it’s temporary and get back to schedule. I’m amazed how many mom’s feel this way and they even have family that’s over every day to help. Deep breath, next day shoot for awesome
magnificent! From the hundreds of tabs in our browser minds to the free maid and chef…. every bit of this is beautiful joy and hilarious truth. Thank you.
Yes! I have 6 ranging from 2 to 14. We have a fun little game we play if I ever have to go out with all the kids in tow; we count the number of people who count us as they walk past, it’s pretty entertaining!
Love this! Mine are 21, 18, 16 and 9. Your paragraph about our brain function with 4 kids is spot on. I’ve always said that the kids took all my brain cells (whether in my womb or out). One really good thing about having multiple children is we master the ability to multitask!! But don’t ask me to remember too much, everything must be written down!!!!
It can be crazy, but it does get better. I felt similar when my fourth was born and my third was only 16 months…now with #5 being 2.5, the older kids are a much bigger help, we do daytime baths and we have leaving the house almost down to a science, so as long as J plan AT LEAST a half hour to get out of the house into the car, then we do pretty well. The mommy brain will get better as the baby gets older too…do some of those fun, fit brain type games…they really do help…and READ. Also…learn to say no to things…I know sometimes all the things are good, but sometimes life just gets too crazy and it’s better to step back and slow down for a little bit. My kids are 10, 8, 6, 5, 2. ?
Loooved this!! I only had two children – I know – what?? – but would have loved more and now they are grown ups (which really just means they live somewhere else)….haahaa! Believe me when I say that I am still in mommy mode more times than not. Anyway…this was so wonderful and true and funny and real! Just perfect..which is what your family is!
We have a 7 yr old 6 yr old almost 3 yr old and a 9 mth old. i think he’s 9mths. His birthday is in august. I know that for sure. I was there.
Is it bad that i refuse to stop #3 from biting her finger and toe nails? That’s 20 less nails for me to clip!!
The baby still gets sponge baths on my bed so i can watch netflix and dont have to fill the tub. He’s clean either way.
I LOVE LOVE LOVE this!!! This is so accurate, I was dying when I read #3 lol. You should try on 6 kids for a day 😉
24 years, 22 years, 16 years, 6 years, 4 years, 3 years, 2 years, 10 months
10,6,5, and 3months:) I had tears laughing so hard at this. This is my life too and I LOVE IT. There is one difference. I do still coordinate outfits on Sunday mornings only:)
35, 32, 28, 28! All of them got 4 year degrees and jobs. I loved my minivan! 5 grandkids right now. Hang in there, 4 kids are great.
Seven, five, three and 9 months. Amen sister!! Mom on, gals!
6, 4, 2 and 5 months, my entourage, we do role call before we leave so I don’t leave anyone behind! My dad helps fold our laundry and has asked on numerous occasions “is this all from one week?!” I couldn’t do it without the help of my parents and in-laws, thank God for them, cause it is crazy and I wouldn’t have it any other way:-)
I always get the “you have your handful” like it is ok for people to say. Mine are 11,8,2,and 8 months. It’s work, but nothing great comes without a little work ?❤️
Linda
I had two sets of four who are now 27, 29, 31, 32, 39. 42, 43, and 46. We had lots of fun as they grew up. and we have lots of fun with them and the 21 grandchildren now.
I’m having a hard enough time trying to decide on a 3rd but I really like that the picture in this blog has a hidden 5th child! 🙂
I love this article. Totally describes my life. My crew is 12, 10, 8 and 4. Gotta love them!
I have six children, who are now 36, 34, 33, 30, 28 and 25. I have heard all the jokes and comments there are to make. My favorites are “Wow, you need a parade permit” and “have you thought about getting cable tv to watch at night ?” We never did anything small, normally when we went out each child took at friend or two. I would do it all over again any day. I don’t blink when friend ask me to baby sit for 3 kids, it’s a piece of cake. I am crazy you bet, do I live my kind of crazy ? You bet I do.
That was a super fun read 🙂
This is awesome!!! I have a 6,5,3 and 1 year old. All boys! This is my life to a T minus the brushing ponytails!
At one time I had a newly turned 3 year old, a 14 month old, and newborn twins! This perfectly described my life during that time. Now they are 7, 5, and 4 years old. It was crazy, chaotic, fun, exhausting, and draining, and quite honestly…..I miss it!
Thanks for the laughs! 2 baths per week has always been our norm for the kids. So a 3 day gap, then a 4 day gap. They’re still just fine after 4 days, so I have done the math on how many less days per year if we just went to a every 4 day schedule instead of 2x per week.
My four are 16, 13, 11, and 8. I always get “How do you do it?” I’d like to say “wait do I not have to? I thought they were my kids. Do they raise themselves?”
Mine are now 38, 36, 34 and 31….. My younger daughter once said (after I lost 2 of them at a school function) ‘my mom has too many kids!’….. Would do it all over again!! ( not losing them but having them !!)
Thanks for the memories! You only get twenty four hours a day, no matter how many you raise and it can be hectic, but in the end, what you have invested in is your treasure! Mine are 49, 48, 47, 45, 43, 41, 39, 35, 29, 16, 16 and 13. I just turned 70 and we have 36 grandchildren so far. The dividends are amazing!
Are the youngest children biological? I ask because I’m still not a mommy at 44 and even though I do plan to adopt, I would like to go through pregnancy too.
Wow, yes, you win the prize, congratulations
43, 42, 39, 37…23!
Mine are now 33,31,30,27,25,23,21. We heard ” you have your hands full” so many times. I would say no just my heart! Cherish your little ones. It really does go by fast and believe me they will all eventually sleep in their own beds, go potty by their self, dress themselves, eat their veggies, ect. ect..
16, 10, 6, and 8 months and want more.
This was a fun read. I’m a Mom of 5, 27-26 years, 4 boys still at home, and I love it!! I look at Mom’s at church or a store, that have 4 or 5 and always say, beautiful family, God has blessed. If we end up talking, I always comment that, in my head I’m thinking wow , that’s crazy, then I think, wow, that was me 18 years ago.hahaha. Still being blessed by my bunch!!
Oops, fat fingers, that’s 17-26 years. Hahaha
Great article. Ours are 13, 11, 9, and 7. I remember (vaguely) the total chaos of four very young children.
Here’s a phrase to add to the list: “How brave of you to take all four children out.” This has been said to me multiple times. Never to my wife. Apparently it’s no big deal for my wife to do it all the time, but for me, well, gosh, I must be super man or something. Or maybe I’m just being a dad who has errands to run and I’m trying to teach my children to adapt to circumstance instead of being controlled by them.
Another great situation – I’m a second career seminarian (which means we have limited income and yes we survive and are fed). Last year we lived overseas to do an exchange year of studies. So many people were amazed by the fact that we would even consider this. Yet, it was one of the absolute best things we have ever done as a family. We grew closer as a family, we experienced amazing things. We adapted. And the kids learned so much about life having lived abroad.
So many people think traveling with children is a hassle. Parts of it can be, but there are plenty of other parts that make traveling with children awesome.
Love this! Mine are 14, 12, 10, 9.
Hey soul sista! Thanks for the laughs & knowing I’m not the only one!! Made my heart so happy! I had 4 in 4.5 years!!
We are crazy. We are expecting our 1st and want 4. Btw, we are in medical school. Loved this article and can’t wait for the insanity…insanely awesome, that is! (The husband, the medical student, typed this in full aggreement with his wife who wanted to comment.)
Hey! Wife of a family doc here! We had 3 in residency…… Now we’re out and determining the planning the 4th…..4,3, 18mos are the current ages 🙂 Whoop!!! It’s madness and fun and you may need counseling but with God all things are possible and these girls are worth it!
All this is so true! My kids are now 18,16,14,12. Yes, you read that right! It does get better and personally thought it was easier with 4 than 2 since the older ones can help out with the younger ones. Thanks so much for writing this and sharing your opinion. It is just one of those you just cannot understand unless you have gone through it yourself. I wouldn’t change any of it!!!
13, 12, 8, 6. I feel your pain. I have all boys and if one person says, “All boys, woo I bet you’re busy!” I’m going to scream and rip my hair out!!
I have 4 girls and get comments like that all the time… Along with the “are you going to try for a boy?” As if having all girls is punishment. My husband gets it most of the time with comments like, “oh, wow, you poor guy.” It’s infuriating.
I was one of four girls and loved it. I now have three boys and the last one is a girl. It’s so strange how when I was pregnant people were so shocked that we wanted another…until they learned it was a girl. Then it was like the pregnancy was justified. Not because it was another beautiful life but because she was a girl. I even had a Wal-Mart employee high five me about it…that was weird.
Absolutely spot on! Thanks for the memories… Mine are now 34, 26, 25, 22. You will survive and thrive. Trust me. Then you get the grands…God’s reward for not killing your teens!
I have 7,yes,7!! They are 36, 30yrs. 10months 3days–he will always stay this age, 32, 29, 25, 22, 19. You will survive and have wonderful memories and laughs to enjoy. I know you don’t want to hear this now, but every day is a gift, b/c everyday you have them to hold in your arms. Tomorrow is not promised, as we found out. Love them deeply. And, no, we didn’t plan one of them.
Guess I’m a generation ahead of most of you. We had eight kids(2 boys and 6 girls). They gave us 26 “grands” who so far have blessed us with 12 “greats”. Three of the families live in my neighborhood so we have lots of gettogethers and cousins have grown up together. Life is good!!!!
My kids are 13, 11, 10, & 5…and baby #5 is due in 8 weeks. It’s crazy making, but I wouldn’t want it any other way. Ever.
Mine are 28, 24, 13 and 6. Number four was a beautiful oops at age 45, and I love having this opportunity to do it all again!
This was a great read; both funny and tender. :0)
#4 due in about a month, and I had already been getting the comments with only 3. Plus the, “this one wasn’t plannrd, right,” from some nosies. All the kids are very energetic, but are kind and living to others (amongst each other is a different story some of the time), drive me bonkers when running errands, and generally wear me out. But what great playmates and life-long friends (hopefully) they will have in each other. And they’ve been excitedly waiting for their new sibling and I know everything will just be the best! Though, i’ll still be exhausted 😉
Very cute and humorous! I never married and had no kids (which was not a choice I made, but a sad fact of life for me) and so I sometimes look wistfully at the families I see, and secretly cheer when I see moms and dads with more than 2 kids in tow. But your posting makes it clear it’s like a three ring circus every day.
I grew up in the early ’60’s in a family of six kids, and blog posts like yours give me a great insight into my own mom and dad. I remember as a very little kid bedtime was a joint effort by Mom and Dad – two of us in the tub at once and the littlest getting a bath in the kitchen sink! The older boys took their baths after we were done. (No showers in those days!)
As I read your very cute and humorous description of what it’s like to have four kids, I thought back fondly of my own mom, and have more insight from an adult perspective into what was actually probably going on in her moments of impatience (read: hollering). 🙂 But one thing I never, ever doubted was her unending and tremendous love for me and for each of us. And it wasn’t from the material things my parents had or gave us (which wasn’t a lot) I knew this. It was from them providing a home, a family, values, regularity, and having expectations of me to grow up with virtues, and they living those virtues themselves (like integrity, honesty, kindness, generosity, faithfulness, prudence, courage, temperance (self-control)) that made me know they loved me, and made my childhood a happy one.
So even if it’s chaos every day, if you are giving your kids that, you are succeeding. And remember, raising kids is not a sprint – it’s a marathon. God bless you. 🙂
My four kids get a bath every week whether they need it or not. 🙂
The shoes yes!!!! Why is it so hard????? We can be all ready to go and posed to be early at something and then end up being 20 minutes late because of the time it takes us to get shoes!!!!!
Hilarious! Yes I have four kids ages 20,19,14 and 12. No child left behind meant that everything including backpacks, lunches, shoes, sports and PE clothes. Permission slips, homework and everything else would be at some point forgotten. My husband and I teach full time too and while it hasn’t gotten any easier, it is different. We are truly blessed and I am thankful I slowly getting my mind back ( I had 27 browsers open just now lol).
Ours are 13, 11, 8, and 6….with #5 coming In Novemer…it is WILD and awesome…we homeschooled for 7 years when they were little as we did ministry and it worked best with that schedule…it’s all about what you get used to (and giving up bathing EVERYONE EVERY night)!
When you are pregnant at 43 with number 7, it brings a whole ‘nother list of questions. It’s kind of sad as the bigger ones stop going places with you, you stopped getting the comments and you miss them….my kids are 22, 20, 17,16,13,12,and 5:). We are only going to have the 5 yr old at home this week. I don’t think I am going to cook. At all.
Mine are 14, 13, 9 & 6 (I think:)
And we didn’t plan the last two, but my husband & I couldn’t be happier to have a house full of fun & different personalities! They’re truly a gift from God!!!
I haven’t laughed so hard in a long time, this blog is hilarious! We had a blended family of 6 children and now we have no idea how any of us survived the insanity of it all. Now that we are empty nesters I can shower as long as I want without interruption, so hold onto that thought.
Thank you so much for this. Ours are 18mths, 3, 5 & 8, we would not have our life any other way. I’ve just learned to smile & nod at people’s comments in public. I thought it was just me that 52 different things going on at one time-thank you for putting this into perspective & helping me laugh that I’m not alone.
I have 10 siblings. We were born in 1967, 1968, 1969, 1970, 1972, 1973, 1975, 1977, 1979 and 1981. I grew up in station wagons, suburbans, custom vans with five bench seats. When we went camping we took our motor home AND pop up trailer to fit everyone. I shared a bedroom until I was 17 years old with at least one sister. My dad was an accountant and my mother was a stay at home mom and she is amazing. I love my large family although now that we’re all adults with families we’ve only had the entire family together twice at the same time and location in the last 10 years at my parent’s 40th and 50th wedding anniversaries. I have empathy for moms raising multiple kids and feel sorry for kids who have no siblings. I always had a best friend growing up, big brothers who watched out for me, younger siblings to watch and play with and my life has been enriched by being a member of our family. I wouldn’t trade a minute of it.
Love this! So much truth in here. I’m a mom of 5. My kids’ ages are 13, 12, 10, 7, 4.
#truth
I would say more but I’ve already forgotten what I was going to write and I now see my youngest had been shoved in the trash can. God bless?
I just had my fourth one week ago today, and these things are true already! When I was pregnant I was out one time and this guy commented that I almost had enough for a basketball team. I thought, “well, that’s a new one!” People are funny.
So true…mine are 22, 20, 16 & 12 all girls….they are my favorite people to be around
Hilarious! Comforting to know I’m not alone. Mine are 5, 3, 2 and #4 coming in November. I’m learning to joy every moment and all they teach me and my husband.
The second best part about this blog is all the amazing comments. No snark or judgment or nastiness. Just support and love. I just had my first in December at 33 years old. He’s now 6.5 months old and an absolute riot! I’ve been wearing my husband down since before I was pregnant. He used to tow a hard line at 2, and now he doesn’t even flinch when I talk about “the fourth one”. Your blog post made me laugh out loud and the comments made me cry. I didn’t know I could love anything or anyone as much as I love my son. I want a whole tribe.
I am a single mother and I have four. Mental.
4 in 4.5 years. Yup. this is my life. I LOVE, like totally LURVE, when people ask how I get everything done. HA. whatevs. NOTHING is ever done. My kids are alive, you seriously want more than that?!?
I’m the youngest of 4!!! I am so happy my mom had four girls 🙂 idk how she did it as a single mom with no financial help or anything. She’s my rock. Now my sisters are 32, 31, 29, and I’m 25. They are literally my bestest friends in the world. I have a total of 9 nieces and nephews I love it. Big families are the best! Keep up the good work you beautiful mothers!
This was brilliant, funny, relatable, and inspiring. You are a hero in my book, just for putting up with strangers’ comments alone! I have three kids in Northern CA, and for some reason people are ape-sh*** amazed. I’m like, “Guys! Come on, do we live in communist China or something? I’m not breaking any rules here.” That being said, the past year has been the craziest, most stressful year of my life since we added #3. Hat’s off for adding a fourth!!
I have 5 kids 16, 15,12,10,9 plus my husband is a big kid too lol I sometimes tell people yes these are all my kids and they all have different father’s just to see the look on their faces it is hilarious. When the kids were young they were a lot easier to handle now that they are teens and I have 3 girls pmsing at the same time I want to run away! They get more demanding and lazy with age…. But I always know when they are sucking up to do something cuz that’s the only time they all get along.
I have 9 year old triplets and a 6 year old! I love this post!!! So funny and so true!!
Loved this so much! My four are 22, 24, 26 and 27. And while I “couldn’t wait” till they grew up so I’d have more time to write, I have have 2 adorable granddaughters who live nearby and whenever I am asked if I can babysit I say YES. Children are such a gift. Grandchildren are that gift squared.
Great Article…. I wish mine where as close in age oldest is 10 and I have triplet girls at a whooping age of 2 and our house is just the same. Any and everything is game for these chicks by the way all girls. I’ve heard some very impeding questions concerning the triplet. I now down to a mom of 6 or even 7 I’m already struggling with just my 4. Lol!!!
I FEEL YOU! I have five: 7, 4, 2, 2, & 1. Writhing you’ve written is spot on. We’re a freak show parade every time I go to Walmart (or anywhere else, though Walmart is usually the only place where I can handle all of them in public by myself, because of those glorious plastic child seats attached to some of their shopping carts). I’ve skipped baths for the sake of sanity (you know, hypothetically). I cannot get my children to understand the putting on of shoes or the getting into the car, even though English is our first and only language. I subsist mostly on lukewarm coffee and the kids’ leftovers (and my secret chocolate stash). Even as I write this, my right arm is tingling as circulation returns because the baby fell asleep on it and you do. not. wake. the baby. Unless the house is on fire. Speaking of which, CANSOMEBODYPLEASESTOPTHETWINSFROMTRYINGTOTURNTHEKNOBSONTHESTOVERIGHTNOWTHANKYOU!!! I’m also convinced my laundry spawns in the hamper while it waits as I rewash the load already IN the washer that I forgot about which had started to sour. And, um, I shower twice a week if I’m lucky. Solidarity, momma. I’m in the trenches right next to you.
The oldest was 9 when we brought home the 6th. I look back at pictures and think how in the world did we make it past morning !
I totally get this…I have 5 kids! My everyday is crazy! But at the end of the day I wouldn’t change it.
-from a fellow crazy sister
I am about 4 weeks pregnant with my 4th…equal parts terrified and excited! So far the kidlets are 6, 4 and 1. My husband just became a stay at home dad, which takes daily stress down a little. I go back to my job in the military next week, after a year of maternity…not sure they will be too pleased with me. Anyways thanks for the laugh!
EXACTLY! This is my life haha kids 6,4,19 months, 5 months. It made me laugh. Thank you. The bathing, just everything SPOT.ON.
Absolutely true! Mine are 7, 8,10, 12. My three younger are each about 18 months apart and I still cannot believe how many people ask if I have twins or triplets. The best was once when the baby choked on a metal object and I had to call and emergency squad and the tech asked if I was running a daycare. I had only my 4 kids. Great article!
I have 11,9,5,4 – and just found myself laughing out loud at most of this… how true!!
Thanks for sharing!
I just laughed so hard I cried. Mine are 6, heaven, 4, 2, and due in January. This is so true. So lovely. So encouraging. Thank you!
16,15,13,11, 12 weekeish in utero This artcal is great! When my four were little I made a mom friend who had four the exact same ages and genders as mine. She was a lifesaver. Bath time was 4-6 kids in a kiddy pool with soap after many hot play dates. Unill a baby pooped in the pool. Everyone out, now!
Wonderful message! So great to hear there are so many ‘not perfect’ or ‘not striving for perfection’ moms out there 🙂
We are expecting our 8th and wouldn’t change a thing either. So blessed!
I have 4 kids. 2 girls and 2 boys . 11,9, 3 and 10 months . I wouldn’t change my life for anything I love the chaos and madness that happens . I always tell my husband I am going to miss this when they are all gone.
My sister in law and brother and mother in law always ask us when we are going to fixed so we don’t have another. It drives me up a wall. It is none of there business. My husband said that he is going to tell them that he got fixed even tho we haven’t .
I have 5 – yes, the literal handful. Mine are now 20,18,12,10,10. Got the set of twins to bring up the rear. Let’s hear it for old eggs!!!!
My favorite comments were (and I kid you not) “Are they all from the same father?” YES! and “Are you Mormon/Catholic?” No, Lutheran – kinda Catholic lite and not even close to Mormon.
I got all the same comments you did and even though those comments have lessened over the years as they have aged and we are not all together all the time, people are still amazed that I have and purposefully planned to have at least 4 kids (the twin thing gave us the bonus and got us to 5).
Things are easier in some ways now that they are older and harder in other ways. It’s all been hard, just different kinds of hard at different times. Kids are never easy, no matter what the age.
When my kids are fighting and upset that there are SO many of them, I ask them to pick one of them and I’ll send them back. They never can and I never could either. They all fit and they are all meant to be mine. ❤️
“The literal handful.” I love that so much! We are in the process of adding a fifth via foster care. Definitely going to keep that “literal handful” comment in my back pocket. Beautiful words. Thanks for stopping by. 🙂
It is so worth all of it…mine are now 55, 56, 57 and the oldest would have been 58..but we lost her almost 6 years ago. Enjoy, because those without any children will never know the joy they bring. Been there and done that.
Love this! I only have 3 right now, but number 4 is on the way! I have the same 2 boys, 2 girls. It’s just perfect!
But yes you described my life perfectly. ❤️
Following your blog now!
It not easy you need to be tough we are having 4 kids aged 6y7m,5y2m,4y3m and 1y10m having real hard time.
Thank you for writing this. You made my day, we only have 2 kids but use to want to have four . Here i thought my life was chaos since our kids are 13 month apart oldes 30 month.