Because we live in a world telling us that individual preference is king, this quote stopped me in my tracks a few years ago:

“Education is teaching our children to desire the right things.”

-Plato

Do you teach your kids to desire the right things?

I think we are collectively missing an opportunity.

For years, my kids’ favorite hobbies were each a different video game. “That’s what they like,” I shrugged. One of my kids didn’t enjoy reading at all. “He just isn’t into books,” I assumed that was that.

But our kids are still new here! They haven’t seen all of the things yet. How can they possibly know if digital entertainment is their favorite “hobby,” when they haven’t invested the time it takes to get good at hiking, BMX biking, baking, writing a book, learning piano, choreographing a dance?

Perhaps your young kids have had exposure to these things. And perhaps they still desire to spend all their free time being digitally entertained.

Are we satisfied with the status quo, despite the opportunity costs?

I ask this humbly, as a mom who was okay with this. Not because I would intentionally answer the question, “Yes, I’m okay that my kids desire to fill all of their free time with digital entertainment.”

Rather, I never asked myself this question at all. I never considered Plato’s exhortation, and even failed to apply the biblical command that we train our children in the way they should go. Certainly, I agreed with the element of morally training our kids, teaching them right and wrong.

But educating desire? This never occurred to me.

(And before you object that this is too hard, I’d bet the change in my pocket that your husband has already effortlessly educated your children to desire which NFL team to root for…)

We get to teach our children to:

• Desire God and pleasing Him
• Desire to love our siblings, parents, family and neighbors
• Desire to grow in wisdom and virtue
• Desire to cultivate the gifts they’ve been uniquely wired with
• Desire to bless others with their giftings
• Desire to explore and enjoy creation
• Desire to live a meaningful life
• Desire to appreciate others’ giftings
• Desire to enjoy the world as God intended

How do you begin to educate desire?

Here are five ways we intentionally educate desire in our home:

Story. Read beautiful picture books with themes that glorify what you’re trying to instill. Courage, kindness, forgiveness, kindness, selflessness, resilience. Share stories from when you were a kid and honed a skill, share where your hard work took you. Share your failures and the diligence required to overcome.

Mentor. “Show” is more powerful than “tell.” If you’re trying to teach hard work but are spending your own time bingeing on social media, your credibility will be shot.

Name and affirm your child’s gifts. “You’re incredible at those monkey bars. I can tell you have a lot of upper body strength and endurance.” “Look at how patient you were when that tower fell. You spent a lot of time building it, and when it fell you didn’t explode in anger. That’s not easy.” “The colors you choose for this picture are creative and beautiful together. You have a great eye for design and beauty.”

Imagine together. “If you work at any job when you grow up, what would it be?” “If you could help anyone who is hurting, who would you help?” “If you could solve any one problem on earth, what problem would you solve?”

Use the everyday stuff. When your child recounts a problem or victory at school, name and celebrate the happenings that are worthy of celebrating. “You looked for the kid without a playmate and invited them to join you?! YES! I bet the angels were clapping, what a beautiful way to love your neighbor. How did that feel when you did that? Does it make you want to look for more ways to be a helper?”

How do you help educate desire in your kids? Comment below!

If you’re looking for Christmas gift ideas that will help educate desire in your kids, check out my Free and Screen-Free Gift Guide here.

Photo credit: “Happy Kids” by Prayudi Hartono